DECIDE
Consider common triggers - are they still as powerful? Have you noticed any changes in your feelings in those situations?
Our struggles and successes over time remind us of the ongoing need to keep training up those alcohol free muscles. The experiences of substances like sugar, chocolate and cheese are similar. Cravings and dependence are the body doing what the body does. Alcohol just does it with more intensity!
Over time thoughts about drinking or drink change e.g. Seeing it as “just what you do” at social situations to uncovering beliefs that it is essential to connect with work, people or deal with deep and painful feelings. Experiences during alcohol free times change neural pathways, breaking the connection between that event or feeling and alcohol.
Liberation vs Fixation is a sliding scale, as we move to liberation more time and head space opens up.
We discussed the importance of self-care and finding new hobbies.
We looked at our current non-negotiables, e.g. not drinking on feelings and trying alternative solutions ( e.g HALT, go for a walk, read, eat, reach out to pathmate, try a soft drink and load up with water) before drinking. One individual now realises drinking is a form of self harm, to punish herself for feelings of unworthiness, describing it as linked to an overwhelm of negative emotions or confusion.
We talked about building up self approval, perhaps via a gratitude journal focussed on positives.
Phrases like “I approve of you, I am proud of that thing you did today etc.. “ and keeping a note of the kind comments of appreciation people do often give. We want to allow ourselves to receive them and to believe them.
This week is about reviewing factors contributing to where we are at now. This leads nicely into the decision stages in the next steps!